my newest obsession

http://blip.fm/ktdoggy

may you finally rest in peace

another one(s)

I think I could make an entire blog dedicated to the wonderful things Eliot says, but for now I'll just include them here.

#1
Eliot has a bad habit of drinking his milk, juice, water, etc. like a frat boy at a kegger. No joke, it doesn't matter if it's 6oz or 44oz, he will gulp his beverage without taking a breath and then gasp for air when he's finished.
We told him that he needs to slow down on several occasions, and the other morning he lost all patience with us. During breakfast he started to gulp his milk. I said, "Eliot, remember, you need to slow down. Drink it slower, not faster." Joel chimed in with something like, "Yea, buddy, slow down."

Eliot said, "I know, I know. That's not MY problem mom and dad. That's YOUR problem."

#2
I slept on my neck wrong a few nights ago and have had this kink in my neck that only lets me turn my head slightly to the left before excruciating pain radiates throughout my body. Eliot said something to me in the car this morning and when I turned to look at him I let out a little yelp. He asked me what was wrong and I told him I had hurt my neck.

"I didn't hurt MY neck," he said, "because I'm a boy, and boys don't hurt their necks."

"Really?" I asked.

"Boys don't hurt their necks because they have muscles. Girls hurt their necks because they don't have muscles. They have flowers in their tummys."



4 going on 16-year old male chauvinist

Guest Blog

I posted on my friend Adam's blog Pomomusings here. He is doing a guest series on Plurality that runs until the end of May. There have been some really great posts so far. 

Enjoy.

my sentiments exactly

Last night at the grocery store, Eliot and I were stopped by the cheese and sour cream when a woman tapped me on the arm.
I turned around to find a smallish elderly woman with a head scarf and black shawl draped around her shoulders.
"I hope you take lots of pictures," she said as she pointed a shaky finger in Eliot's direction.
I laughed. "I do, I said. Believe me."
"He's beautiful," she said.
And with a serious and thoughtful face she looked at me and said,
"He's like a work of art," and turned to walk away before I could even thank her.

lemonade

Yesterday, for the first time ever, Eliot did something for himself from start to finish with no help at all.
Self-help skills are something we've been working on this past year and it's been really hard on Eliot and his self-esteem.
Moving into our new house has been great because we have more space, more drawers, more places to store crap.
So Eliot now has his bowls, cups, plates, and utensils at his level where he can reach them. It has been SO exciting for him to be able to get things himself. He is constantly telling me, "I do it. I can do it, Mom." Which is miles away from the crying and whining for help, and telling me "I'm not strong enough. It's too hard." and ultimately having a major meltdown due to his frustration.
So yesterday when he got home from school he asked for a glass of lemonade. I told him sure and he said "I'll get the cup." So he did. As he saw me reaching for the refrigerator door he said, "No mom, I can do it." He grabbed the pitcher and carried it over to the counter. As he started to pour he hesitated. There wasn't much lemondae left in this large pitcher and he was going to have to really tilt the pitcher to get the lemonade to come out. He looked at me and said "it's too hard, mom." And sounded defeated. So I told him, "Naw, you can do it. Just tip it a little farther." And he did. He poured a glass of lemonade. He didn't spill. When he was done he put the pitcher back in the fridge, and held his glass of lemonade in his hands like a trophy. I felt the same way I had when he was 3 and I watched him go down the stairs by himself for the first time (and without going sideways.) He had conquered something.

And he was beaming.

"That's awesome, Eliot. I'm really proud of you." I told him.

He smiled and said, "I'm gonna go tell dad."

Keeping it real with the big man upstairs

Tonight as I prayed with Eliot, I said "Thank you for this beautiful day"

and was interrupted. . .

"No, mom," he says.

"Thank you for beautiful boobs. And beautiful penis. And penis crabs. The penis crabs will get you. Amen!"

Amen, indeed.